When in Rome . . .

From my wilder days in Snyder, I know there are some of you that like to live a tad dangerously, to walk on the dark side, or to just immerse yourself in some off-the-beaten path kinds of experiences. There's no better time to do it than a vacation of course, because no one is around to witness your depravity!

Seriously, San Francisco abounds with experiences that don't appear in Travel Guides because they don't belong there. I'm talking primarily about those things that only the 'indigenous tribes' partake of, the activities that comprise the life of your average San Franciscan. In my view, these are important elements of any trip -- if I want to truly capture the flavor of any place I visit, then I need to experience life the way locals do. Can you imagine if someone came to Snyder and all they did was eat at McDonald's? They'd have no idea what being a Snyderite is all about! When in Rome . . .

In San Francisco, take a chance and indulge in one of the myriad hole-in-the-wall tacquerias. This won't be too much of a leap for West Texans, but the food is different from what we're used to. There's less emphasis on cheese, more on sour cream. And they're not particularly big on fried anything . . . think burritos, tacos (not the crispy kind like at Spanish Inn), think lots of cilantro. Most important: Think lunch under five bucks. Who can complain about that?

Getting a bit further afield from a Snyder 'comfort zone,' you'll want to try one of the zillions of Asian dives that line the streets of SF. I'm not talking about the nice, sit-down places; I'm talking about the late-night Korean noodle houses, Vietnamese pho shops and Chinese diners that are strewn about the streets like so much wrapping paper on Christmas day. These may look frightening, because the food can be totally unfamiliar; but if you go into one, look around: The people eating there will all be vibrant and healthy, so if it works for them, it probably won't kill you. I sometimes seized with a craving for Banh Mi (little Vietnamese sandwiches) which usually sell for about $3; not to mention Pho -- vermicelli noodle soup with various meats, onions, basil and Srirach sauce to spice it up. Deelish!

On the 'entertainment' side of the off-the-wall tour, no trip to San Francisco would be complete without a trip to the Castro. Home to a large portion of the city's gay community, it's colorful to say the least. On a recent visit, I passed a bookstore that had employed some "helpers" to promote some new books: Each was a 250-pound football player type, all dolled up in royal regalia like the Queen of England. Only with beards. You'll want to stop in at Hot Cookie for a little snack, and further up on Castro street, be sure to hit Naia, home of the best gelatto in the universe. Try their pumpkin seed gelatto if they have it.

If you want to witness some uniquely San Francisco nightlife, stop by Martuni's on the cusp of the Castro and Mission neighborhoods. It's a wonderful old piano bar, and in many respects it epitomizes the eclectic hodgepodge of people that comprise San Francisco: You'll see a mix of straight and gay, young and old, professional and . . . well, everything. The last time I was there an older gay man was singing show tunes (badly) at the piano, and he was followed by a bunch of college girls who started belting out a Bruce Springstein number. The latter was met with raucous applause from the audience, except for one elderly gentleman in a dress, who glowered until they switched to Rod Stewart's "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy."

If you happen to be a piano bar fanatic, there are a number of others in the Bay Area, including some as far afield as Walnut Creek. It's a bit of a hike from SF, but I just love Bing Crosby's Piano Bar, with its unsurprising emphasis on that singer's music. Ol' Bing and I had a similar range, so I can sing along with the best of 'em to his music without missing too many notes. To me, the chance to sing "White Christmas" makes it worth the trip to Walnut Creek, but if you're not the sing-along lunatic that I am, there are a number of other good places to try while you're there.

Thanks to bayernyc and San Francisco Bay Guardian for the photos!